Guilt. Oh, the sneaky little gremlin that lurks in the shadows of our minds, whispering “How dare you?” every time we dare to choose ourselves. It’s one of the biggest paradigms that can hold us back, slow us down, and—let’s be real—make us dim our light until we’re practically invisible.
How often have you felt guilty for something you shouldn’t feel guilty about? Like, I don’t know…
Having a great time while your loved ones are drowning in the same old drama?
Saying no to an invite because you actually like yourself enough to rest?
Being unapologetically YOU while the world expects you to shrink, conform, and nod along politely?
And the big one—the real guilt trip that keeps people stuck—stepping into your highest version.
Why? Because stepping up means stepping out of old versions of yourself. It means letting go of people, habits, and activities that no longer align with who you’re becoming. And sure, you love these things (or at least, you did once). But guess what? They will keep you playing small. And while the guilt might not be screaming at you in neon lights, it’s lurking in the subconscious, bubbling just beneath the surface, making you tiptoe around your own expansion.
You may have physically walked away. But have you emotionally?
Have you energetically?
Letting Go ≠ Bad Person
Listen, letting go isn’t easy. Feeling sad? Totally natural. Grieving? Also necessary. But feeling guilty?
That’s the part we need to dismantle. Because tell me—does it really make sense to feel guilty for choosing a life that lights you up?
If you stayed small, played safe, and kept saying yes when your soul was screaming no—would that be love?
Absolutely not.
That would be self-betrayal. That would be a watered-down, puppet version of you. And I don’t know about you, but I don’t see how pretending to be someone you’re not serves anyone—especially the people you love.
Because here’s the truth: Your expansion is not a betrayal. It is an act of love.
There’s Nothing to Forgive
How many of us are walking around thinking we need to forgive ourselves for being who we are? For making the hard choices? For growing out of relationships, jobs, cities, versions of ourselves?
But what if there’s nothing to forgive?
What if your past self—whether she or he—did the best they could with what they knew at the time? (Spoiler: they did.) And what if every single decision—no matter how painful—was actually a step toward your most authentic, powerful life?
I spent years feeling guilty for choosing me. For leaving behind people and places I love. But you know what? I did it because I love them. And because I love myself, too.
So, the next time guilt comes knocking, ask yourself:
Is this guilt coming from my playing-small version? Or from my empowered version?
Because your highest self isn’t guilt-tripping you. She or he is cheering you on.
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